Caution: Religious Rant Ahead

Some people are unbelievable. Truly.

I know many of you are what I would deem "religious," which in Maggie-ese means that you have a clearly defined faith, that you practice in accordance with the organized rites and rituals of a particular church. So before I get into full rant, none of these comments are directed to you, but to individuals I know personally in my daily life. For the most part, none of my fellow bloggers have ever done anything to contribute to my negative opinion of religion. So please...do not think this is directed at you.

As some of you know, I was raised Catholic, but due to an unfortunate experience with a Catholic school, and more specifically, the priest who ran it, and some of the more widely publicized, uhm, issues of the Church, I have ceased that practice. I have tried a few other religions on for size, but nothing else seems to quite fit, due in part to the fact that I simply cannot get past the bad taste in my mouth.

One thing that seems to add to my religious aversion is many of the religious people I know (and again, I mean the one's I know outside the blogging world...in real life). With few exceptions, they are not nice people. Why is this? I mean, I know we are all human, and thus prone to human error, but some people don't seem to remember this. Some people are incredibly judgmental, hypocritical and just flat out rude, yet they hold themselves up as examples of superiority because they attend church once a week and have a bible next to their beds.

I work with one of the worst examples of Christianity I have had the displeasure to know. Today this "Christian" woman, whom I will call "B," happened upon me and another co-worker, "P" in a conversation. P was telling me two of her granddaughters were attending classes at their church called "Love Can Wait," in which abstinence is taught as an alternative to birth control. She expressed that she hoped this worked better on these two granddaughters than it did on the oldest, who currently lives with her boyfriend without the benefit of marital vows.

B voluntarily injected herself into our conversation, uninvited, to give her esteemed opinion, "Either you have a commitment to the Lord, or you don't." In other words, you are either a good righteous woman, or you are a corrupt whore.

I may be overreacting just a bit, but that is what I heard. I should mention here that B is fond of making these kind of pronouncements, and that she does, in fact, mean to offend, so I am not overreacting as much as it may seem at first glance.

I should also mention here that CO and I lived together before marriage, which B very well knows, and both of our sons live with their respective girlfriends as well, which B also knows.

Now I am not saying that CO and my living situation was ideal, but given that we had been having a long-distance relationship, and I had to move to another state to see if 1) our relationship could move to the next level, and 2) having no parenting experience whatsoever, if I could handle becoming a step-mother to three boys, our only financial recourse was to cohabitate. Nor am I saying that my sons' relationships are ideal...because you know I have concerns.

I am not defending my actions, or the actions of my kids. I don't have to. That isn't even my point.

My point is twofold. First, I will concede that by certain religious standards, I am, in fact, a corrupt whore. Fine. That is between me and God, and it is none of B's damn business. She was not asked for her opinion. She was not even a part of that conversation. And I seem to remember from my Catholic school days, that you should "judge not lest ye be judged." Or something close to that.

I also remember that "he who is without sin should cast the first stone." And THAT is my second point. B has been married three times. No, her first two husbands did not die...she is twice divorced. I on the other hand, corrupt whore that I am, married my CO, and have never been divorced. Who the hell is she to stand in judgment of me, or anyone else? What gives her the right to think she is superior to anyone? Regular church attendance and a bible? I would never begin to hold myself out as an expert, but I hardly think that is Jesus' message.

This is not the first time B has demonstrated her hypocrisy. This is a fairly regular occurrence. she has on various occasions told me that divorce is against "God's plan," alcohol is a tool of the devil (oh, she used to drink quite a lot from what I understand), and that being financially bankrupt is akin to not meeting your obligaitons to God (she filed bankruptcy in 2001).

Normally, I simply ignore her. Today, following a few weeks full of shit that have me twisted in knots, I could not. I told her I would not have this conversation with her, because I took offense to what she had just said.

She owes me an apology. I will never get one, but she owes me one.

Now once, on another individual's blog, in the comments of a post, someone accused me of being a hypocrite myself, and using my past religious, let's call them disappointments, as an excuse for being lazy every Sunday. As a preemptive strike, let me address those issues before they turn up in the comments to this post.

Of course all humans are, at one time or another, guilty of hypocrisy. I do try to limit it as much as possible, but I will not ever claim I am hypocrisy free. No one is. But I am not standing in judgment of someone else's life. I am standing in judgment of being judged. I did not look down my nose at her and proclaim myself a better human being...until now, because now I know that I am a better human being, and if that is hypocritical of me, all I can say is hypocrisy breeds hypocrisy.

Further more, no one has the knowledge to say my religious aversion is just a cop-out. I have spent more time thinking about, studying and struggling with my religious beliefs than most people ever dream of, and I assure you, no decision was made lightly. To suggest I used something of such great importance as a convenient excuse to sleep in on Sunday is highly offensive to me, and frankly no one is in possession of enough knowledge to make such a claim. I feel like I was gracious about it on the other blog, to keep the peace for my host, but please don't go there in my own home.

So...thoughts? Insight? What do I do with this woman?